The Girl with the Goalden Boot

Wednesday, January 02, 2008

 

It's almost the 2nd and there are still fireworks going off...

Happy new year everyone! :)

I don't feel particularly festive this year. Just not in the mood. Probably because I worked my normal shift on both Christmas Eve and NYE, so this past week just felt, well, normal. Christmas day and today were uneventful, just bumming at home, doing chores, watching DVDs or channel surfing, etc.

Every year I keep wishing not to spend NYE alone or just with the folks. You know what, it happened again this year. That's 4, maybe 5 years in a row already. At least I have an excuse this year - I had to work. But still, it's quite pathetic for someone in her twenties.

I did have fun on the days around these two days though. As I mentioned before, I went to see the World Youth Day cross and icon at Cronulla on the 22nd. We celebrated Christmas with the in-laws at my brother's apartment (where I played FIFA08!!! on Wii, and spied from the balcony with my dad's new camera, lol!) on the 23rd. Went bowling (for the first time) with friends and their friends on the 27th. Went kayaking and quad biking on the 29th with the same group at Glenworth Valley, near Gosford - the weather was perfect, kayaking was tiring but relaxing (I know, doesn't exactly make sense, but it felt that way), but quad biking was a little scary.

2007 - the bad
1. I went through periods when I felt completely hopeless and helpless with life. You know about the shitty job at the lab I seem to be stuck with. It becomes worse when your brother earns like 100K a year, when your peers have travelled the globe, some have bought their own cars, many have found the love of their lives...you can't help but compare yourself with the people around you, and wonder why you haven't managed to do the same. I get so fucking disappointed with myself. "I have so many insecurities they fight for prominence."

2. I skipped celebrating my birthday this year. Helps with finding out how important you are to people you think you are friends with. Facebook photos and events help with that too.

3. All of you know about my "I got accepted into med but I won't be doing med" story.

4. Music, I have decided, has been a burden all my life. I've enjoyed success with it, it's probably the only thing in life I can do effortlessly and it's a good source of income, but my heart hasn't been there, or is no longer there. Had I not taken piano lessons, I may have gone into sport more seriously (tennis, football, basketball, cricket...). Or, I could have spent more time with my studies, e.g. I may have chosen physics instead of 3 units of music in year 12. I would've been in the 2000 Olympics opening ceremony if I didn't have to do my A.Mus in piano (a performance diploma) the same year! I would've almost finished Master of Science already had I not thought of doing Master of Music Studies (complete waste of time...thank God I quit). I'm not able to enjoy music the way a normal person would, because I hear every pitch, rhythm, timbre, etc. And how does one judge music performance? Why is one performer or performance better than another? In science, there are experiments and results to back up whether one explanation is valid or not. In sport, goals, points and other stats prove why one player is better than another. Music is so subjective... I mean, everyone thinks they can sing or compose or whatever these days - even Paris Hilton! *headdesk*

2007 - the good
1. I survived doing two postgraduate degrees and working two jobs this year. Well, work wasn't too hard. I don't want to sound conceited, but I'm pleased with my academic results - averaging HD in my science degree. It's something I'd never thought I'd achieve (I'd barely managed a credit average during my undergrad years), let alone do it while doing a completely different degree, and working too.

2. I kept my resolution and played football regularly! Yeah, it's only a social club and at the park on Sundays, but it's a first for me. Especially being the only girl there. Hee.

3. Thanks to Vanessa, a high school friend I wasn't that close to back in the day, I joined the Young Adult group at church, and it has been one of the best things to have happened all year. The YA group is an incredible bunch of down-to-earth, friendly people, and I thank God for them. Joining this group of amazing people balances out the unhappiness I have suffered during the year.

4. Rafael Nadal. He's a true champion. My love for him goes beyond the tennis. I have learnt from him this year. He reminds me to be true to myself, to be humble, and to always work hard and find room for improvement. Through him, I've realised it's OK to still be living and going on holidays with my parents even though I'm 23. Oh, and it's also OK to love eating pizza but not like cheese. ;)

2008 - resolutions
1. Be a bigger and better person - be humble, kind-hearted and more generous.
2. Try my best to maintain or improve on my grades.
3. Stop driving dangerously - no tailgating, even when provoked. *looks*
4. Start playing tennis again (less injury risk than football).
5. Stop whining when things don't work out. Find a solution!

Lola Nadal 12:16 AM